Dealing with Loneliness

People always say “people come, and people go”, and I totally agree with that statement. Well, when people left us, it would be so broken. My first and second month of 2023 are so colorfull. Sometimes, I cried alone in the middle of my room just thinking that everyone starts to leave me one by one. Day by day, my feeling is getting worse. I blamed my self and everyone who left me, but one day I realized that nothing can stay forever with us even our own selves. Everyone has their own life, and I could not be selfish to force them to stay with me or just to always be there beside me when I need them. I started to go to a cafe or just a place where I can see a beautiful view alone although at first, I felt that it was weird, and sometimes I was afraid, but then I enjoyed it. Did I forget my friends? NO. I never forgot anyone in my life either the best one or the worst one. I just let my self to learn about how to be independent, so I won’t be as broken as before when someone left me. 

Over the last couple of weeks, I have been kind of emotional. I have a lot of feelings that I can’t tell anyone. I just wrote it on my diary book although sometimes I thought that I was like my own self in several years ago. “If you don’t want to be left by someone, just find a partner” someone told me when I told her about what I felt. Well, I disagree with her statement. Finding a partner is not just because we are feeling lonely because a partner can also leave us, so just find the best one when you are ready enough to have a relationship. The idea of loneliness has always been at the forefront of my mind. Now I know how to deal with that although sometimes I still feel so broken, but I believe that life is about process.

One day, my friend told me that he was so difficult to find a friend just to drink a cup of coffee. I kew him although not very well. He was known by most people, so I was shocked when he told me about it. Then, I realized one thing that everyone has loneliness side, but we must deal with that. I push my self hardly to deal with loneliness, and when I succeed, I thank my self because it was not an easy journey. Dear all fighters, just remember that you have your self, and that’s enough.